Harry Potter and the what????

Coming Christmas to a Theatre Near You

Coming in time for Christmas!

Popularity: 6% [?]

Tags: Christmas, Harry-Potter
Posted in Featured, Funny, Movie News | No Comments »

Man, It Sucks Gettin’ Old

In our ever continuing saga to show you how much life sucks, even for celebrities, we present “Man, It Sucks Gettin’ Old,” an ongoing photo gallery of celebs then and now.
Remember, unless we die young we’re all going to get there. Now, mind you, I’m not posting these pix to make fun of our beloved celebs of twenty to forty years ago, shit, I’m in the same boat. I just find it very intriguing that, even though we are the same body, mind, soul and essence, what we look like at 50+ is a totally different bucket of shit than what we looked like in our 20s. When we get up in the morning we think of ourselves as being young and vital, and when we look at the mirror we see some grey, bloated, wrinkled thing looking back.
Sometimes, when I see a woman in her 80s I see a little girl, and when I see a baby I see the old man he will become. So folks that are over fifty, you remember what our friends looked like; folks under thirty, treasure what you look like cause it ain’t gonna last for long!

[View with PicLens]

So, doesn’t that make you wanna kill yourself?

Popularity: 1% [?]

Tags: 80s, Body Mind Soul, Celebrities, Celebs, Forty Years, Little Girl, Long Gallery, Mirror, Old Man, Photo Gallery, Saga
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Hell Freezes Over

Here’s pictorial proof that Hell has, indeed, frozen over. Up to six inches of snow have been dumped on the main Las Vegas valley, with Summerlin, Henderson and Green Valley being hit the hardest.

As of December 18 another ten inches is forecasted forcing something that is frequently seen in the northern states but not to much here: Schools being closed because of snow. Nellis AFB released people early pending a strong storm which brought flurries around 4PM. Some casinos released non-essential people early. People in Las Vegas can’t drive, anyway, so fender-benders are up drastically: good for body shops in town. A lot of trees and other flora have been damaged, including tree limbs falling from the weight of snow and ice.

This also proves that, despite movie mythology, Las Vegas is NOT 120 F all year long, it DOES get damned cold during the winter, with an average daytime temp in the low forties. Temperatures in Vegas have been high of 43 and low of 29 of late.

You live long enough you do get to see Hell freeze over.

Popularity: 2% [?]

Tags: casinos, fender benders, Flora, forties, hell, Las-Vegas, Mythology, northern states, Proof, six inches, snow and ice, summerlin, temperatures, tree limbs, Trees, vegas valley
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Gene…You’re Fired!

Kiss frontman Gene Simmons has got the boot from The US Celebrity Apprentice. Businessman Donald Trump fired the rock star after he took over as leader of the women’s team – and failed to help them win the weekly challenge.The singer showed no emotion as Trump told him to pack his bags and simply said: “I respect your decision.” But he blasted the female Apprentice team and claimed they stood no chance of winning the competition.

“In their present form the ladies don’t stand a popcorn fart chance of even shining the guys’ shoes,” he snorted. Simmons, 58, took over the girls’ side after they went 2-0 down in the weekly tasks. The two teams were told to come up with a way of marketing Kodak’s Easy Share printer – and sell the equipment to the general public. The ladies looked to have it in the bag after the men spilt a cup of coffee onto a computer and lost all their artwork. The mishap occurred as Lennox Lewis, Tito

Ortiz and Stephen Baldwin climbed down from a table and accidentally tipped the furniture up in the air.

But Kodak executives were less than impressed with Simmons’ selling strategy and named the boys’ team the winner. After the singer close Jennie Finch and Carol Alt to face the chop with him, Trump said he had no choice but to fire Simmons.

Popularity: 3% [?]

Tags: Artwork, Boys Team, Businessman, Carol Alt, Celebrity Apprentice, Chop, Cup Of Coffee, Donald Trump, Easy Share Printer, Emotion, Gene-Simmons, Jennie Finch, Kodak, Lennox Lewis, Mishap, Owen Williams, Rock Star, Showbiz, Stephen Baldwin, Tito Ortiz
Posted in Entertainment, Funny, Movie and TV Reviews | 6 Comments »

Bid on Ozzy’s signed 10 foot Les Paul Gibson guitar

For any Ozzy Osbourne fan, this is your chance to own a piece of rock ‘n roll history. Gibson Guitartown London, the capital’s most vibrant summer public art exhibition announces that all 61 unique hand painted and signed Gibson guitars are now available to bid online exclusively at Ebay via the www.londonguitartown.com website.

This is your opportunity to bid exclusively for Ozzy Osbourne’s personally signed 10 foot Gibson Les Paul replica guitar. The giant fiberglass guitar called “Skull” was designed and hand painted by the highly acclaimed Sunday Times caricaturist Gerald Scarfe and displayed publicly around More London on London’s South Bank by City Hall, SE1 from June 2007 to September 2007 attracting over 2.5 million visitors.

Gibson Guitartown London is a charity inspired campaign bringing the power of music together with art to raise money for Nordoff- Robbins Music Therapy, The Prince’s Trust and Teenage Cancer Trust. All money raised from the sale of the guitars at auction will be split equally between the three designated charities.

Other hand painted Gibson Guitartown London guitars signed by rock legends such Sir Paul McCartney, Paul Weller, Noel Gallagher, Rod Stewart, Robert Plant, Bruce Dickinson, Brian May, Slash, Roger Waters, Mark Knopfler, New Order, Razorlight, Kaiser Chiefs, Stereophonics, Nick Mason and Ronnie Wood to name a few are now available to bid exclusively at Ebay.

The Gibson Guitartown London charity auction will take place in IndigO2 at The O2 on Tuesday 20th November 2007

Bid now for Ozzy Osbourne’s 10 foot Gibson Les Paul guitar
http://cgi.liveauctions.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&category=52935&item=250164984092

 For more information on Gibson Guitartown London, please visit www.londonguitartown.com

To order an auction catalogue please visit www.juliensauctions.com/londonguitartown

Popularity: 5% [?]

Tags: auction, Auction Catalogue, Charity Auction, ebay, Gerald Scarfe, Gibson Guitar, gibson guitars, gibson les paul, gibson les paul guitar, guitartown, hand painted, kaiser chiefs, liveauctions, london charity, mark knopfler, nick, Nick Mason, noel gallagher, Nordoff Robbins, nordoff robbins music therapy, ozzy osbourne, Paul Gibson, paul weller, piece of rock, razorlight, Rock Legends, Sir Paul Mccartney, stereophonics, teenage cancer trust
Posted in Entertainment, Funny, Music General | Comments Off

English Language Paradoxes

There is no egg in eggplant or ham in hamburger; neither apple nor pine in pineapple. English muffins were not invented in England or French fries in France. Sweetmeats are candies, while sweetbreads, which aren’t sweet, are meat.

We take English for granted. But if we explore its paradoxes, we find that quicksand can work slowly, boxing rings are square, and a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.

And why is it that writers write, but fingers don’t fing, grocers don’t groce, and hammers don’t ham? If the plural of tooth is teeth, why isn’t the plural of booth beeth? One goose, two geese. So, one moose, two meese? One index, two indices? Is cheese the plural of choose?

If teachers taught, why didnt preachers praught? If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat? Why is something that has some awe great but if it is full of awe it’s bad?

In what language do people recite at a play, and play at a recital? Ship by truck, and send cargo by ship? Have noses that run and feet that smell? Park on driveways and drive on parkways? How can a slim chance and a fat chance be the same, while a wise man and a wise guy are opposites? How can the weather be hot as hell one day and cold as hell another?

And why do they call it a building if it was ALREADY built!

When a house burns up, it burns down. You fill in a form by filling it out, and an alarm clock goes off by going on. When the stars are out, they are visible, but when the lights are out, they are invisible. And why, when I wind up my watch, I start it, but when I wind up this essay, I end it.

Popularity: 15% [?]

Tags: Alarm Clock, Boxing Rings, chance-Ship-plural-eggplant-egg-hell-ham-awe-hamburger-, Cold As Hell, Driveways, Eggplant, English, English Muffins, Fing, French Fries, funny, Groce, Grocers, Guinea Pig, Hell One, Hurts-My-Brain, Language, Meese, Paradox, Parkways, Quicksand, Slim Chance, Sweetbreads, Sweetmeats, Wise Guy, Wise Man
Posted in Funny, Hurts My Brain | No Comments »